Most of the time I’m thrilled to go on vacation. It’s a happy thing that is my big de-stressor. I come back to life much more invigorated and ready to go. Disney is great about doing that for me. But every so often, like with this upcoming trip, I struggle with vacation guilt.
When you plan a trip far in advance, there are a lot of things that could potentially come up (by the way, trip insurance is great for a lot of things, but it wouldn’t necessarily help in my case). For me, it’s my cat who is sick and as of now his diagnosis is unknown. We are supposed to leave for Disney in a week, but we don’t know what his treatment is going to be or what he needs yet. For others it could be a sick family member, a change at work, a car that needs to be repaired, or any number of things that could cause vacation guilt.
Our visit with Merlin.
Here are some of the things I’m dealing with that are causing me not to be excited about going to Disney World in a week:
Money
This of course is a big one, and if it’s a main concern it’s where having trip insurance would really help you out. Merlin’s treatments and procedures have already cost us about $7,000. So yeah, the $1500 or so that we spent on this vacation definitely would have helped, but at this point I can’t really get much of it back. Flights, paying to rent DVC points, and the marathon fee are all non-refundable at this point. So it’s either let the money go to waste or go on the trip regardless.
Having Fun
I don’t know how I can have fun when I’ve been so sad all week. I cried a lot yesterday. Is being at the most magical place on earth going to make me feel better or worse? And if Merlin comes home soon I could be cuddling him and spending time with him rather than being in Disney.
Jason was there for my very first race in 2014. I don’t know if he’ll be there for my first marathon now.
Being without Jason
Probably the biggest thing going on is that if Merlin needs a lot of care, one of us has to stay home. It’s possible that Jason will have to skip the trip, unless we can figure out what Merlin needs soon and his stepmom (who fosters cats) is willing to help out with taking care of him. This is something we’ve planned together for a long time, and I would be so sad to do it without Jason. I’ve gone to Disney plenty of times without him, but this is for the marathon trip. My first, and likely only, marathon. It meant a lot to have him there, cheering him on, and now that may not be the case.
Friends
Even if Jason can’t come, I am lucky that I will have 5 other friends who are coming on this trip with me. They have been so supportive, and while I know they care about me and Merlin a lot, of course his illness doesn’t affect them in the same way it does for Jason and me. So they’ll be ready to have fun in Disney. I don’t want to be the downer of the group.
Judgement
It makes me feel sad too to know that there are probably lots of people who will judge me for going to Disney right now. I know they’ll think “she started a GoFundMe for her cat and now she’s just flying off to Florida?” As I said the trip is already paid for, and anyway Jason may stay home so we’ll be losing the money for his flight and portion of the hotel (at least we should be able to save his tickets for a future trip). If it wasn’t for the fact that this is the full marathon that I’ve been training for since July, I would almost certainly stay home. Especially if Jason is staying there’s not much more that I can do. And I don’t know if I’d be able to go through all that training again next year. I’m ready to run a marathon.
I really can’t get excited for this trip at all, despite leaving so soon. It’s my marathon trip so it should be special. But I’m nervous enough about the marathon itself – now I’ll have that on top of the fact that Jason may not be there to support me and I’ll be worrying about Merlin too. How much magic does Disney really have? Is there still a way for me to have a good time next week?
Have you ever had to deal with vacation guilt? How did it go?
As one of the friends mentioned in your post, please do not worry about being a “downer.” Both Mercedes and I went through very similar things with our cats recently, so we know exactly where you’re coming from. And while we’ll try to make sure you have fun on the trip, we totally understand that you’ll be sad. *hugs*
(And I do not judge you *at all* for going to Disney next week. You’ve been training hard for this marathon, and you’ve given Merlin years of love.)
Thank you <3 <3 I know you both feel the same about your cats so you get it. It's just so hard to try and associate a Disney trip with possibly being sad. Are you even allowed to be sad in Disney? lol. We are working on seeing if Jason can come even if it's just for the day or two.
What an honest post, Becky! I’m sorry about your cat, and I’ll make sure to cross my fingers for him! I hope you are able to relax and enjoy your trip in the end.
— Lisa // FjordsAndBeaches.com
Thank you so much! I’m sure once I’m in Disney it will work its magic and I’ll have a good time, even if I get a little sad about Merlin being sick now and again.
What a bittersweet time for you! Be sure to take care of yourself — especially before, during, and after your race! Safe travels!
Thank you – I am trying hard to take better care of myself. I’ve been so upset I haven’t been eating much and I know that’s not a good thing to do to myself before a marathon.
Ugh, what a tough situation. I hope Merlin pulls through with the treatments. Is there any way you can bring him along? I hope you’re still able to enjoy the trip, even though things are a little uncertain at the moment.
Thank you. We were planning to fly so I think it would be tough to bring him – we also don’t want to do anything to stress him out right now, which a plane ride or long car trip might do. But we’ll do what’s best for him, whether that means Jason stays home or not.
I hope your situation gets better. It’s so hard when a pet is sick but especially in your case. I hope that Merlin gets better and everything gets better!! As much as you have to deal with, try to enjoy your trip a little bit.
Thank you so much. Merlin came home tonight so that definitely helps a bit to know that he’s comfortable here.
Once my poor puppy was hit by a car and killed while we flew to WDW. It was the worst phone call to get after a plane ride. 🙁 I hope your kitty feels better!
Oh my word, that would be one of my worst nightmares 🙁 I worry about my pets so much even when they’re healthy. It’s one of the reasons we got the petcube camera, so we could check up on them when we’re away.
It’s so amazing how much you care for you cat. Not a lot of owners these days are as invested. Things will get better! Enjoy your trip because in Disney anything is possible!
Thanks. They are absolutely family to us and we would do anything for them in the same way we would for a child, really. But I’m trying to keep my hopes up about Disney!
🙁 I hope your cat starts feeling better! I know I would feel the same way about leaving my pup if she wasn’t doing well, so I completely understand! Sending good vibes for Merlin and that your race goes well!
Thanks, it’s definitely tough. We’re hoping for the best outcome, he’s already looking better now that he’s been home for a few days.
Awwwwwww. 🙁 If you need a cat-loving shoulder to cry on, I’ll be around!
Thank you! <3 He's starting to look a little better now so I'm hopeful that he'll get better!